alexander-andrews-458492.jpg

The Day the Alphabet Quit

Original Children's Book

Strolling on a Saturday, 
I tripped and fell on letter A.

"Well hello, A, you awesome ace,
why have you wandered out of place?”

“I quit!” A cried, “It’s plain to see,
I can’t compete with letter B.”

Then B bounced in, in quite bad shape,
I blurted out, "What caused that scrape?!" 

He shrugged and said, "I should have stayed in bed,
B is for bad, I'd be better off dead."

Well I scooped them both up and walked on my way.
What was the alphabet up to today?

As I came 'round the corner at Clementine Street,
I tripped yet again and looked down at my feet.

“Get out of our way, and don’t dilly-dally!”
ordered Miss C and D, as they marched towards the alley.

“We’re quitting our spots, as the 3rd and 4th letters,
look at E and F, they’re fantastic and better!”

"Excuse me," interjected E,
I'm far from excellent, just look at me!"

“Tell me about it,” fumed F, from a fence,
“I myself am fatigued, and my pain is immense."

“Girl, please,” growled a voice that I knew had to be
that of gruff but beguiling letter G.

"I'm unhappy too," offered H, with a sigh,
My neighboring letter is incredible I.”

“Did somebody call me?” asked I, with a grin.
“I’ve been here awhile, just listening in.

It’s true I’m an interesting, intelligent guy,
you can’t live without me, so don’t even try."

"Mighty impressive," muttered M rolling his eye,
"Say, what are those two doing, trying to fly?!"

Just then, tumbled N from a branch overhead,
O followed behind landing right on her head.

“NO, NO, NO!” shouted N “is the word that I make!”
“ON, ON, ON!” hollered O, is the word I create!”

“Be quiet!” I shushed them, “and listen to me,
you two need each other, obviously.

“Climb into my backpack, I’m on a mission,
To get the alphabet back in linguistic condition."

"Practically speaking," opined P, from his perch,
you'd have better luck praying with piglets in church."

Then it got very quiet and that's when I knew,
we couldn't be far from regal queen Q.

Simply stunning, she was, with a crown on her head,
she questioned me quietly, “Is the alphabet dead?”

“Not yet, but we need you, now hop on my back,
We're still a few letters short of a full alphabet stack. ”

Mr. R wasn't far, I found him at the bar,
Brooding about how he'd never be a big star.

“Listen, you rascal, I’ve had quite enough.
I know you’re discouraged and think life is rough,

but really, that’s silly, which reminds me, where’s S?”
“I quit too,” offered S, "couldn’t handle the stress.”

“Seriously, guys?!" I snapped in frustration,
You're letting down writers all over the nation! 

"Not to mention little kids who are learning to write,
and like to read bedtime stories at night."

“Let’s call out some words that start with T, U and V,
and when we’re finished with that, do X, Y and Z”

Tickle! Toaster! Umbrella and View!
Wonderful, Xylophone, Yummy and Zoo!

Upon hearing their words sung with joy and delight,
The final six letters stepped out into sight.

“We’re coming, we’re coming! We’re so very excited!
To see the whole alphabet be reunited!”

I smiled and faced them and they all chanted “Speech!”
So I took a deep breath and then started to speak...

“Each of you is your own shining star,
never forget how important you are,

“Think of the fabulous things you can spell,
You have fun songs to sing and great stories to tell!

“Next time you think you’re no good on your own,
remember that letters can’t do it alone.

“Let’s sing it together now, loud, proud and strong;
I want to hear you belt out the alphabet song!”